*Matt. 16:25- “For whosoever will save his life shall lose it: and whosoever will lose his life for my sake shall find it.”
I have set August 4 for my move date. I have been packing up my apartment this week in preparation for the upcoming move. As I sit here with boxes all around me, I realize that I really don’t NEED any of these things. I realize how much “stuff” I really have and that ultimately none of these things can bring me fulfillment. Don’t get me wrong, I am so thankful for all of the material possessions that Lord has blessed me with, but as I pack up my things, I can not escape the thoughts of all of the people I have met in Africa who have no material possessions to their name. Here I am trying to figure out how I am going to be able to downsize, while so many people around the world may not even own more than one shirt or one pair of pants. It has just really put it all in perspective for me and started me thinking: I am not only packing up my material possessions, I am packing up in many ways my life as to date.
I am fulfilling my last full week at my job. I am trying to visit and say goodbye to friends here who have become my family away from home. I am saying goodbye to the state I have lived in all my life. I’m leaving my church family that has become my spiritual support system. In so many ways I am leaving everything I know. Up until this point I didn’t realize how hard it would be to leave everything behind. This week it finally became a reality to me. I felt overwhelmed and somewhat heartbroken to leave it all, and that is when the Lord placed Matt. 16:25* on my heart. This isn’t about me. This isn’t about my personal ambitions. It is about what God wants for my life and the reason He has put me on this earth. I know many people looking in from the outside don’t understand. They wonder how I can give up control and give my life to something that is not based on material gain. I can even understand it from their view. It doesn’t make sense from a “business” perspective. But, I also know that in order to receive the full riches that the Lord has for me, I have to first give up the life that I have. In order to gain my life, I must first lose it.
I desire the heritage the Lord has for me, but without being willing to give it all up, there is no way I would ever receive all that He has for me. It is hard sometimes. I find myself trying to hold on to some things by the tips of my fingernails, but I know that the life Christ has for those who give up everything for Him, is a life that surpasses anything we could ever hope to imagine for ourselves. That is worth giving it all up for…He is worth giving it all up!
For His Glory,
Caroline 🙂
Ps. 56:3
